Loneliness and how to combat it

It’s a common misconception that loneliness occurs most in the elderly when in fact it’s most prevalent in the 16-24 year old age group who are the loneliest in the UK (BBC Radio 4, All in the Mind). The BBC’s research discovered that 40% of young people feel lonely versus 27% of over 75s.  

Sitting exams, deliberating the future, and splitting from friends - not to mention a global pandemic – takes its toll on young adults looking for stability. University is a huge catalyst of change. Should they go? How far should they be from home? Who will they be friends with?  

As well as being a seminal time for self-discovery, university can challenge how people make connections with others. What worked in previous friendships might not work in a new one and it can be hard to settle in. Students are essentially transitioning from their inherited families to chosen families and who, additionally, might not pick up on the normal signs of that person not feeling their best.  

Calls to Samaritans mentioning loneliness and isolation increased by more than a fifth in two years, and it’s impacted education too. Discussing this with our teams in Student Services and the Winchester Student Union, loneliness is a topic that has come up more and more. Often, people have such high expectations of what university will be like that when it doesn’t reach this level it can be destabilising. Some students might see university as an opportunity to re-invent themselves and grow a great circle of friends and this is a lot of pressure. 

Finding what connects us is hard. Putting yourself out there is hard. But here are a few ideas that have helped both students and staff at the University of Winchester who have struggled with loneliness: 

Get outside

Whether it’s just a walk or something more strenuous, breathe in the fresh air and soak up the vitamin d. This is especially important during the winter where the days are longer and darker and seasonal affective disorder can kick in. 

Although it’s good to plug your headphones in and listen to a podcast or some music, this can sometimes separate you from the outdoors. Listen to the sounds around you and take in the little things that keep you in the present and can add some unexpected joy to your day. 

Remind yourself of what you love

If you're struggling to make connections with people, it can be easy to lose track of the pastimes that you enjoy (and very easy to binge watch another tv series). Here are some things that people have taken up:

• Gardening: "I found growing windowsill herbs from seed and sharing with my flatmates a good way to talk to people."
• Landscape painting
• Starting a blog: "I wanted to have an outlet for my poetry so I created a blog. I hadn't realised how much I had missed writing until I started it up again."
• Running: "I set myself the target of trying to run a little further each time, which gave me something to focus on."
• Perfecting a sourdough loaf
• Knitting
• Volunteering: "I decided to start helping out at an animal shelter to meet new people (and spend time with the animals!)
• Gaming

 

Extra-Curricular Activities

Although it might feel daunting to join a team or society, it could be the perfect opportunity for you to strike up a new friendship. We have a huge range of ways you can get involved, from job opportunities, sports teams, to volunteering and events. Take a look at these over on our SU website here. 

Join something that interests you and discover likeminded people to talk to.

Make the most of the support available

 

Talking to someone can really help you feel better about loneliness. At Winchester we have lots of advice and resources for people who are struggling. Winchester Student Union Advice Centre provides free, independent and impartial advice and support on matters relating to academic, wellbeing, money and housing. In collaboration with the university, they run the wellbeing café on Wednesday afternoons. This is an opportunity for students to meet, chat, and play games over a cuppa. We also have Student Listeners who are trained in active listneing skills and support at an informal level.

There are also various wellbeing apps (Headspace, Calm) which have useful resources such as meditation programmes that can help you to think differently about your situation. 

Other organisations such as Samaritans, Mind, and the NHS have infomration on how you can get support. 

 

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